Thursday, September 20, 2012

Reality Check

Alright!  The month of August is over and I didn't accomplish very much. September came and still I did nothing! I'm in a rut. Depressed and feeling quite defeated. I've lost family, I've lost friends, I failed at Nano, one of my stories was rejected and everything I've written in the last two weeks has turned dark, ugly and I'm quite ashamed to say has totally sucked!

It's made me quite discouraged and I'm not very good at feeling out of control, so when that happens I get upset. When I'm upset and stressed out, I eat. Yep, I am a "foody"! So of course takeout has been my best friend these past couple of weeks. I haven't felt like cooking and now I've gained weight, blah, too much weight, which has taken my emotional turmoil to new heights. No longer am I upset, I'm down right pissed off.

So I found myself looking in the mirror last night, battling with my reflection.  "Lady, it's time to quit whining, get off your ass and get your shit together." Disgusted, I stomped out of the bathroom and climbed into bed, intent on sleeping .... but we both know that wasn't going to happen, unlike your significant other you can't tell your inner thoughts to shut the hell up and leave you alone, and then accentuate the fact that you don't want to discuss it by rolling over, huffing loudly and throwing the covers over your head. Oh no, your inner self babbles on and on, laying down the guilt, poking you where you don't want to be poked and forcing you to pay attention.

Sometime during my restless sleep I formulated a plan. A list of things to complete daily and in some cases every other day so I can get back to making writing a priority and reinforce the habit of writing.

I'm putting all this B.S. behind me and soldiering on.



So here is the plan......

1. Facebook posts for my personal page is a must. If I don't post then people start calling to see if I'm okay. So if I want to save some time, it's best to post. YES, I know that sounds a little crazy, but my friends, can talk! A lot!

2. Facebook posts for my writing page is also a must-do, however those posts can quickly be copied over to Twitter and Google Plus knocking off two additional social media communication tools in short order. YAY!

3. A quick trip over to Kindle Boards, gives me a number of new authors to add to my "liked" list, plus I get to view new book covers which always brightens my day.

4. Then it's over to Good Reads to read reviews and write reviews for books I've recently read. Which brings me to the next stop Amazon to see what's free for my kindle.

5. I've got to check the dreaded email and read letters from other authors, agents, publishing companies etc. I really don't want to but it's best to pay attention to what persons are sending you when your mailing out multiple submissions.

6. If I keep pushing by noon, I will have made it to Writers Retreat to talk and read about queries, agents, changes in publishing and other news that writers are expected to know.

7. I'll attempt to complete a blog post at least every other day and after lunch, I'll write or research for an article

8.  Early in the evening and before bed I hope to complete a bit of pleasure reading. You know what they say, it's best to read what you want to write.

So that's the idea. I don't know if I'll be able to get it all done and still fit in some time for a bit of exercise but I hope sometime through out the day I'll actually be able to remove my behind from this chair before it becomes a permanently molded accessory.

It's 2:00 am and i am falling asleep at the computer so I shall bid you all goodnight.

~M.A.



1 comment:

  1. New follower :) I've lived with depression most of my life (since I was 13), I know how horrible it can be. *hugs froma survivor* You can get through this!

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